


That Time Peter was Seriously Creeped Out By an Elf on the Shelf

by Supernaturalislifeforyouandme



Series: That Time Peter... [16]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Edna is a killer(?), Elf on the Shelf, Multi, Peter boi is a scared boi, Poor petey boi, The Avengers can be assholes, Very creepy elf on the shelf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-16 16:00:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16957080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Supernaturalislifeforyouandme/pseuds/Supernaturalislifeforyouandme
Summary: Clint returns with an elf on the shelf named Edna.Edna creeps Peter out.





	That Time Peter was Seriously Creeped Out By an Elf on the Shelf

**Author's Note:**

> Tis short, but I'll update tomorrow (maybe)

After the disaster that was the whole de-aging thing, Peter was exhausted to say the least. He'd never say it out loud, but he was a little glad that Clint was out of the Tower for a bit.

And then he came back, December 8.

At first, it wasn't too bad. Peter was happy to play a few games on the GameCube with Clint.

Then the thing showed up.

The elf.

Of course Peter was seriously creeped out about it, it moved every night, and it really didn't bother him that much. He figured Tony or Clint was moving it.

Then he asked Friday for the footage of Tony or Clint moving it. He saw it, and it wasn't what he was expecting at all.

The elf moved by itself.

He brought the footage to Tony to analyze it, but his father figure didn't seem too worried about it. He brought it to Clint, and he gave him the book the elf brought.

It creeped him out.

So a week later, Peter was doing his best to avoid it.

"It's really creeping me out, Uncle Clint. Where'd it even come from?" Peter asks, eyeing the elf nervously.

"First of all, 'it' is a she, and her name is Edna." Clint says, more focused on the game with Natasha. "And I gave you the book, right? She came from the North Pole."

"But Santa doesn't even exist! Back me up, Aunt Nat." Peter says with a frown.

"He isn't a true believer?" Natasha asks, glancing over to Clint.

"Apparently not." Clint says with a shrug, trying not to loose to Natasha in super smash bros.

"So if everything that's in the book is true, if I touch 'her' she goes away?" Peter asks curiously.

"Yes. But don't even try, I like her around. She catches everything bad that Clint does." Natasha says simply.

"I don't." Peter says with a snort.

And that was the start of it.

The next day, Peter woke up and went to find the elf so he could try to avoid the thing. And there it was, hanging from the ceiling in the living room.

But something was off about it.

So Peter went to investigate. A note fell down from the elf, so naturally Peter picked it up and unfolded it. It read;

'Ask the cat how I feel about being touched

-Edna'

Peter was confused, and looked up to get a closer look at the elf. Edna was holding a mini baseball bat covered in.... Blood?

It took all it had for Peter not to shriek, and he backed up, slightly startled when he backed up into someone.

"Uncle Steve, thank god." Peter says, relieved when he saw who it was.

"Hey, Pete. Have you seen the cat around?" Steve asks curiously, confused on why Tony wanted him to ask Peter that. They never had a cat.

"B-b-but we d-don't have a cat." Peter stutters, backing up a little bit.

"Rogers! I told you not to bring that up." Tony hissed, and Peter wondered when Tony even arrived.

"You mean the memory eraser worked?" Natasha asks, surprised.

"It did. Bruce actually did something good for once." Clint says with a small smirk.

"Ouch." Bruce grumbled.

Peter was just overall scared and confused. They never had a cat, but from what he was picking up, they did. Keyword being 'did'.

"Oh come on, guys. This is just cruel." Steve says, realizing what his fellow Avengers were doing.

Peter was slightly relieved Steve said that. So they were just messing with him.

"Why didn't you clean the evidence up before he woke up?" Steve finished, and Peter went rigid.

"We didn't have time to. Besides, we can't touch Edna." Clint says simply.

"Come on, guys, you're just messing with me, right?" Peter asks, pleadingly.

"May Mittens rest in peace." Tony says with a small sad sigh.

"Okay, now you're really yanking my chain. Even if we did have a cat I wouldn't let him have such a lame name like 'Mittens'." Peter says, not amused at all.

"Let her rest in peace, Pete. Don't make fun of something she couldn't choose." Natasha says with a frown. And it was at this moment that Peter realized they were all standing in a circle around Edna.

"You can drop the facade. This really is cruel." Bucky says as he enters the circle. "We never had a cat."

"You always have to ruin the fun things, don't you?" Sam asks with a sad sigh.

"Thank god." Peter says, letting a breath of relief out.

"It was revenge for when he scared the crap out of us." Steve protests, and everyone corrected him on his language.

"That was funny, though. This wasn't." Peter says with a frown, looking at Edna.

"We didn't do it! It was Edna." Clint says, and everyone agreed.

"Edna is creepy." Bucky grumbles. "Peter and I are going to go cook Christmas cookies, have fun with worshiping a doll."

Peter didn't argue with that, and followed Bucky out of the circle of... He didn't even know what to call the elf-worshiping.

Creepy. That was the word.

Well, at least no cats died, and Bucky saved him from being scared for life.

Besides, what can get better than Christmas cookies?

Nothing. Especially Bucky's.

"Where did they even get the blood?" Peter asks curiously as he helped Bucky gather ingredients.

"I'm not sure. Stark probably pulled some strings." Bucky says with a shrug, not too worried about it.

"Either way, I'm glad that they admitted that the elf wasn't real." Peter says, still relieved about that.

"What do you mean? Edna still moves by herself. They probably set her up with the props." Bucky deadpanned.

"Oh. Oh-kay." Peter says, blinking in surprise. Uncle Bucky wouldn't lie about these things. Right?

"That's what makes her creepy. Did you get the butter out of the microwave?" Bucky asks as said microwave beeps.

"I- um, I forgot about it." Peter says, red as he gets the now melted butter out of the microwave.

"That's fine, just get some more. We have time." Bucky says as he measures out the sugar. "Let's get started."


End file.
